Thomas S. Monson Named 16th Church President

After consulting with my IP/Patent advisor, Sara, (who actually does not represent me in any legal capacity -- otherwise, I like to think she represents me in all capacities (but she might disagree)), here is my fair use spin on the Church's recent press release:

Thomas S. Monson (or "Tom Monson" as he refers to himself in frequent Priesthood Session stories) is the new president of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. President Monson has called, President Henry B. Eyring to be his first counselor and President Dieter F. Uchtdorf to be his second counselor.

President Boyd K. Packer, who I candidly suspected might fill the second counselor position, is the new president of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. The vacancy in the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles will likely be filled during the spring session of General Conference.

[PHOTO REDACTED BY RESIDENT IP/PATENT ATTORNEY]

How is that for Copyright compliant? Ahhh... The life of a lawyer...